Happy Wednesday, Bloggers,
So, as you can tell, I've been kind of ambivalent about my future in the Graphic Design industry. I think I've made a decision on that front: I'm going to finish this degree and then go back for another, one that I can see myself loving for the rest of my life. I'm beginning to feel happy about this decision, because if my second degree doesn't pan out, at least I'll have this to fall back on. Keep me in your prayers. It has kept me up many a night. Life has something more in store for me than I think, I think.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Frustration
Tell me Bloggers: When you get to the real world, is there ever a time when you find the perfect balance of personal time and work time? And a love of both?
Recently I've been feeling very burned out in school and life. I had a mini breakdown the other day when it occurred to me that I'd chosen a major that I don't think I'll love in 5 years. Don't get me wrong, I'm very interested in it, but it is a "pusher" industry, and I've never really been that person, especially if I don't personally like it. I worry that I'll fall into a job that I'll hate and then mete out that hatred of said job to everyone that surrounds me. That thought terrifies me.
I really enjoy creating art, even for mass consumption, but do I have to forego all the teachings of my previous study that said that I should create something that I love? Designing for the consumer is something that I've had to deal with a lot in the recent years, and I find that what I like about a piece of work that I've created is exactly what the customer doesn't like, and vice-versa. I used to think that I was fairly capable of producing work that appealed to the masses, but it hasn't been the case (more often than I'd like to admit). I feel like a loser (self-esteem discussed at a later time) when I make something that no one likes, when the CUSTOMER is supposed to like it. I feel like I'm selling out when I put something out in the world that I would NEVER in a million years want my name on (not that it's come to that point yet), and I just feel...like I'm just pushing a product that isn't new or fresh. I've found that clients either like a very specific thing that is hard to replicate in a way that will make it look presentable, or their ideas span a HUGE variety of designs which, when boiled down, are exactly what everyone else is doing.
I think I'm losing my touch. I feel very ambivalent about my future in graphic design. But I will finish my degree, because if I didn't, I would feel a crushing disappointment towards myself about my cop-out. What happens in the real world when you feel such distain for what you do?
Recently I've been feeling very burned out in school and life. I had a mini breakdown the other day when it occurred to me that I'd chosen a major that I don't think I'll love in 5 years. Don't get me wrong, I'm very interested in it, but it is a "pusher" industry, and I've never really been that person, especially if I don't personally like it. I worry that I'll fall into a job that I'll hate and then mete out that hatred of said job to everyone that surrounds me. That thought terrifies me.
I really enjoy creating art, even for mass consumption, but do I have to forego all the teachings of my previous study that said that I should create something that I love? Designing for the consumer is something that I've had to deal with a lot in the recent years, and I find that what I like about a piece of work that I've created is exactly what the customer doesn't like, and vice-versa. I used to think that I was fairly capable of producing work that appealed to the masses, but it hasn't been the case (more often than I'd like to admit). I feel like a loser (self-esteem discussed at a later time) when I make something that no one likes, when the CUSTOMER is supposed to like it. I feel like I'm selling out when I put something out in the world that I would NEVER in a million years want my name on (not that it's come to that point yet), and I just feel...like I'm just pushing a product that isn't new or fresh. I've found that clients either like a very specific thing that is hard to replicate in a way that will make it look presentable, or their ideas span a HUGE variety of designs which, when boiled down, are exactly what everyone else is doing.
I think I'm losing my touch. I feel very ambivalent about my future in graphic design. But I will finish my degree, because if I didn't, I would feel a crushing disappointment towards myself about my cop-out. What happens in the real world when you feel such distain for what you do?
Friday, March 4, 2011
School has gotten in the way of life...
I have decided to change the way I do this blog. In the past, I divorced myself from it, didn't use any personal pronouns, and limited myself to only four lines. That is going to change. Get ready world...
I like to write, but I haven't had time to in about a year. With this blog, I wanted to keep a kind of living journal of my experiences, but present them in a way that would change the way people felt about verbiage. That was a hard thing to do because sometimes I could even remember what I'd done because I'd also stopped taking pictures as a remembrance of events. School had taken over my life. I didn't think about anything other than what was due next and how long I could work on another design project before I had to get back to the one with the deadline looming. In short, I got burnt out.
That had never happened to me before. I was always good about working with deadlines, and although I am a self-proclaimed procrastinator, I always met them, and sometimes I even got them done early (shocker!). But college was a horse of a different color, and it didn't really hit me until my junior year. I had gotten all of my pre-requisites out of the way my freshman year and the first semester of my sophomore year so that I could work only on art, which in hindsight was probably the worst thing I could have done. My brain was always working on only one side, so my art suffered.
So I've revamped this blog in an attempt to redistribute my brain usage. Day one. So it begins.
I like to write, but I haven't had time to in about a year. With this blog, I wanted to keep a kind of living journal of my experiences, but present them in a way that would change the way people felt about verbiage. That was a hard thing to do because sometimes I could even remember what I'd done because I'd also stopped taking pictures as a remembrance of events. School had taken over my life. I didn't think about anything other than what was due next and how long I could work on another design project before I had to get back to the one with the deadline looming. In short, I got burnt out.
That had never happened to me before. I was always good about working with deadlines, and although I am a self-proclaimed procrastinator, I always met them, and sometimes I even got them done early (shocker!). But college was a horse of a different color, and it didn't really hit me until my junior year. I had gotten all of my pre-requisites out of the way my freshman year and the first semester of my sophomore year so that I could work only on art, which in hindsight was probably the worst thing I could have done. My brain was always working on only one side, so my art suffered.
So I've revamped this blog in an attempt to redistribute my brain usage. Day one. So it begins.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Truth
Any idiot can face a crisis - it's day to day living that wears you out.
Anton Chekhov
So true.
Though, I hope this year is different than the past few.
I have vowed to live by the Serenity Prayer.
Hopefully, this year will be the least stressed,
most fulfilling, and best year yet.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
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